Sex and the double-standard
I'm an older brother. I often say, as an older brother, it's not always fair to be first.
I had to ride a bus to school every day until my senior year. My younger brother rode to school in cars since his freshman year. Everything I received my brother received three years earlier. (I am three years older.)
At the same time, it was never fair for him either. He constantly got compared to his older brother - in terms of behavior, education and abilities. It wasn't fair that I set standards he had to meet or exceed.
It was a double-standard for both us. He was expected to resemble me and I was expected to be the trailblazer for his opportunities.
Whether we like it or not, double standards exist everywhere. This is most prevalent in our double standard when it comes to promiscuity and sex before marriage. As a society, we glorify males for their sexual conquests. At the same time, we expect our females to maintain chastity at all costs.
If a guy sleeps around, he's high-fived, congratulated by his peers and celebrated as a conquering hero while friends and teammates revel in his "heroic" accomplishments. If a girl sleeps around, she's called names, ostracized, humiliated, and often bounced around to other guys for their sexual conquests.
The fact of the matter is this: sex, outside of marriage, is wrong. It's wrong for guys. It's wrong for girls. It demeans all relationships and leaves scars that don't go away. Men who sleep around are just as dangerous as women who sleep around. Both rob innocence and take away something that can never be given back. Both take away something that should be reserved for your spouse and them alone.
Look at the story of Hosea and Gomer found in the first few chapters of Hosea. Gomer's promiscuous ways destroyed her family. Hosea felt anger and shame. Gomer eventually become a slave. It hurt everyone.
However, and this is a big however, this is hope. No matter what you've done - even if you've slept around - Jesus can forgive you and give you a new life. Hosea, at God's command, took Gomer back. He redeemed it. God can and will redeem you too, if that is what you seek.
Don't believe in the lies. Sex is not about conquests. It's not about achievements. It is not just a physical act. It's emotional, spiritual and mental as well. It's something that changes you, and not always for the good. But also remember that Jesus can forgive you, even if you're hurt and broken and at the end of your rope. Nothing is too big for his forgiveness.
I had to ride a bus to school every day until my senior year. My younger brother rode to school in cars since his freshman year. Everything I received my brother received three years earlier. (I am three years older.)
At the same time, it was never fair for him either. He constantly got compared to his older brother - in terms of behavior, education and abilities. It wasn't fair that I set standards he had to meet or exceed.
It was a double-standard for both us. He was expected to resemble me and I was expected to be the trailblazer for his opportunities.
Whether we like it or not, double standards exist everywhere. This is most prevalent in our double standard when it comes to promiscuity and sex before marriage. As a society, we glorify males for their sexual conquests. At the same time, we expect our females to maintain chastity at all costs.
If a guy sleeps around, he's high-fived, congratulated by his peers and celebrated as a conquering hero while friends and teammates revel in his "heroic" accomplishments. If a girl sleeps around, she's called names, ostracized, humiliated, and often bounced around to other guys for their sexual conquests.
The fact of the matter is this: sex, outside of marriage, is wrong. It's wrong for guys. It's wrong for girls. It demeans all relationships and leaves scars that don't go away. Men who sleep around are just as dangerous as women who sleep around. Both rob innocence and take away something that can never be given back. Both take away something that should be reserved for your spouse and them alone.
Look at the story of Hosea and Gomer found in the first few chapters of Hosea. Gomer's promiscuous ways destroyed her family. Hosea felt anger and shame. Gomer eventually become a slave. It hurt everyone.
However, and this is a big however, this is hope. No matter what you've done - even if you've slept around - Jesus can forgive you and give you a new life. Hosea, at God's command, took Gomer back. He redeemed it. God can and will redeem you too, if that is what you seek.
Don't believe in the lies. Sex is not about conquests. It's not about achievements. It is not just a physical act. It's emotional, spiritual and mental as well. It's something that changes you, and not always for the good. But also remember that Jesus can forgive you, even if you're hurt and broken and at the end of your rope. Nothing is too big for his forgiveness.
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